Second day - have I really only been here 2 days????

September 23, 2012

Today is my second day and it has been calmer.  There were some issues at the center and two of our midwives left (one student who just arrived 1 day before me but is just too overwhelmed, and one awesome midwife who I am really confused about – we need the help but it is administrative issues – politics even here uggh!!!!).  I was very sad and overwhelmed and Midwife Rachael is still sick but no one came in today and labor and I discharged my birth from last night – a very very long hard birth with 5 hours of pushing an acyclytic head but she did it. Sometimes running outside into the night with the thunder and lightning to run and roll on the ground in the most basic core of our being birthing ways.  It was astounding and lovely to watch but the traditional midwife here and her attendant did not like it at all. To be honest, that baby would not have turned at all and would not have been born if she hadn’t done what she did.  The baby crashed at the end and I had to resuscitate right at the birth – but no ambu bag to be found.  The mom was 18 and her first baby and had prenatal care so we knew she had been HIV negative months earlier.  Without thinking  and because I had to, I wiped off his face and started mouth to mouth and compressions.  I only puffed and wiped my lips off good after, but then got so worried I did the only thing I could think of – I gargled in hand santizer!

He sort of came around slowly and was very gunky and to be honest I did not know if he would survive the night.  But his eyes were open, his heart was strong and he was trying to breath.  When I awoke the next morning I immediately checked on him and he was strong and crying and lovely.  I then learned the TBAs (traditional birth attendants) do not resuscitate.  If they had taken the time and gotten one of the other midwives it would have been too late.  He would have died.  I feel in many ways my purpose is complete. I go forward imagining and knowing he will do great things (and just pray he is not one of the 50% that will die before his 5^th birthday). Again I am overwhelmed and humbled and know I am where I am supposed to be.

We had been short on interpreters for a variety of reason but they are back now and I had the most delightful lunch of rice and guacamole and cabbage and good, fun company.  All meals are outside; food is cooked over charcoal or the fire.  There are chickens but I will get a stick. I am stronger than I think it appears!

As I write this I am trying to charge my computer. I still do not have internet but Midwife Rachael  (who is my hut mate and awesome and I will write about later) and I will go into Gulu in a few days for supplies and get internet and phone time as well.  The TBAs are awesome and will care for these mama’s and while I feel worried at how short staffed we are I also feel that it is how it is.  My nebulizer finally arrived this morning and so far so good.  I trusted it would arrive sometime but was not surprised it took an extra day.  Africa time is what it is and there is no rush.  I have learned more patience in the last 2 days than my last 45 years. Carmella the TBA today will take all labors and I will sleep.  If I don’t keep  waking up to go outside and look at the stars – so very amazing and awe inspiring.  

Midwife Rachael

Carmella, on of our traditional birth attendants

Rachael's and my hut

View from my shower, pretty sweet!

Our ambulance, sadly this is with Rachael waiting for her flight and Paul our wonderful driver.  This did not happen then but are the best photos to show what it is like

So concludes my second 24 hours. It would be perfect if all my boys were here.  2 days and it feels like a month or lifetime or that I have always been here – though I have so much to learn about how things work!  It is good, and very very very difficult.